Step 1: Make a reasonable request "I need a StateDot salt truck."
Step 2: Make unreasonable demand based on fictitious time restraint involving previous reasonable request, now involving a third party. "I need the boro salt truck, StateDot won't get here in time."
Step 3: Become agitated when your dispatcher balks at the stupidity of asking her to wake up your boro road crew to salt a state road.
Step 4: Make a convoluted mess out of original request. Talk self into hole with dispatcher, boro road crew, and StateDot, ensuring your original reasonable request does not get taken care of in a timely fashion.
(ps. I swear, I'm alive)